Falling Off and Getting Myself Back on Structure is My New Normal

Today marks five months since life changed in the US - five months - hard to believe. I remember our nightly news anchor saying, "make sure you have two weeks worth of food" - ahh, such naive babes we were! Today, many of us are smarter, we take the virus seriously, we socially distance, we wear our masks and we go on living as much of our lives as we can. It's not that I don't want to go back to life before the pandemic, I'm quite certain the majority of us do, but the reality is, we can't. We can't ever go back and that can be really scary and really freaking depressing. This is it. This is our new normal and even when there is a vaccine not everyone will want to be vaccinated and for some it may not even work which again is crazy depressing. Like many I've been frustrated, I've lost my cool, I've been downright angry, sad and mad but none of those feelings helped me. So, I'm working on the grateful part, on the accepting part, on the pivoting part, and most importantly on structure. I'm realizing more and more I'm lost without structure and when I fell off all of last week(!!!) I could feel it, I could see it. My funk was so real and it wasn't pretty. I was crabby, irritable and mostly disappointed in myself which hurt like crazy. I could stay in that space of wallow and complaining. I could eat and drink myself silly but it won't serve me in the end. So, I'm back on structure. I'm back on the gratitude, on the walking, on the exercising, on the writing, on the meditating. If I'm going to live in this new normal I'm going to structure the heck out of it and find ways to build myself up, make myself useful, stay busy, stay focused and find my way in my new normal.